Thursday, December 19, 2013

Jump, Bite, And Fuck Shit Up, The Perfect Recipe For Tomba!


Who's the bad ass motherfucker who gets the jump on pigs, throwing them into one another and beating the shit out of whoever gets in his way? Duke Nukem? Fuck no, that asshole can't even touch Tomba if he tried!

Living in a forest by himself, Tomba only has two priorities.

  1. Jumping on anything alive.
  2. Biting it.
Tomba doesn't give a shit about anything else. His grandfather's bangle that was stolen? An excuse to jump and bite an entire pig army that is trying to take over the world. A hundred year old hermit who wants to guide him? A thousand year old hermit who wants to guide him? A ten-thousand year old hermit who wants to guide him? Who gives a shit about those? Tomba blows them off, steals their goddamn keys, their treasures, and their food and carries on, sinking his teeth into more and more pigs scattered all over the place.